Little Freaks

This was me at age nine, and this was how I showed excitement. I would open my jaw as far as it would go, form a double chin, and stand on my tip-toes, arms stick straight by my side. I don't know why I did it, I always have, and sometimes when I am really excited I still feel a strong urge to do it. It took all my might to not make this face at Sarah Kay.

I was a little freak as a child. I used to make this face, I used to crawl around my elementary school on all fours barking because I wanted to be a dog. At recess I would usually prefer to talk with the teachers supervising than the kids my age. I used to pick apart snails with sticks and do "surgery" on them. I was determined I knew what I was doing and would assign body parts to the different little snail bits; "Here's the heart, the bladder, the intestine, etc." I used to walk around Extended Day Care with a dinosaur walk, T-Rexin' my arms, bobbing my head, and snapping my jaw.

The list goes on, unfortunately. But yea, I was totally a little freak. Somewhere along the way, these things became a part of my past and my present did not contain such silly mischief. But honestly, I kind of miss it. I was free to be whatever I wanted, whether that be Snail-Surgeon General, a dog, or a dinosaur.

I know I'm not the only one that was a freaky child, I know someone else that used to walk around with dinosaur arms, too. And I bet you that person still has urges to revert back to their dinosaur days. And really, nothing that we do can ever get rid of our freaky selves. When I started high school, I was ready to start fresh because nobody knew me. I was "free" to do whatever I wanted, be whoever I wanted. The real me, that freaky little girl in the picture, was trapped inside the V-necks and Pointer gear. She was stashed away into my closet with the rest of the skeletons.

But here she is again. I combed through boxes of pictures to find her. I want people to know her, to know me. I'm having fun again, real fun. Fun that's free. Free to be a freak.

This girl never left me. She was always with me every day. She's a part of who I am. And the reason why I'm okay with her now, is because to those of you reading this, who know me pretty well, this probably isn't a surprise. It's not a surprise because I was never truly able to let the freak go. And I never freaking will. And guess what? I will still have friends tomorrow. So whoever said that nobody will like you if you're a freak was wrong. The strongest example of this: Danny Herrera, everyone still loves him.

If your "friends" do care, they aren't true friends. People that mind don't matter, and people that matter don't mind.

So give live free you little freak.

Freckled, Faulty, and Freaky Free
~Kat